Thursday, December 11, 2003

Office party  

A recent study found that situations and attitudes in the workplace can have an adverse effect on marriage. Among the findings (some of these statistics are from other studies reported in the same article):

The article talks about the dangers involved in spending long hours at work with coworkers of the opposite sex. "What starts out as a coworker relationship develops into a friendship, then a deep friendship, and then into a [romantic] relationship. In my wife's case, work led to business lunches. Business lunches led to 'nonbusiness' lunches and then to 'happy hours.' And the whole thing led to divorce," said one man whose wife divorced him after she had an affair with a coworker.

I read this article several weeks ago. It doesn't apply to me much because I have contact with only one woman at work, and all our contact is over e-mail. We've never even met face to face. Plus, I apparently have some sort of quality that makes women not want to flirt with me (that quality has been described by various people as an air of unapproachability, arrogant condescension, and snide indifference). That's a good thing now, but a source of immense frustration during my single days.

Anyway, I went to my company Christmas party last night and I felt like printing up a copy of the aforementioned article and handing it to whoever organized things. The company rented out a very nice building, complete with catered appetizers and dinner as well as a live band, an expansive dance floor, comfortable couches, and an open bar. Oh, and employees were not allowed to bring guests, including spouses.

I stayed for only two hours, but by the time I left I was already beginning to question the wisdom of having an open bar and an activity (dancing) that encourages people to engage in intimate physical contact with coworkers. Even after one hour, my friend Jerry was having to ward off advances from a tipsy coworker.

Fortunately I don't drink, I can't dance, and women rarely take notice of me (though that could be because I tend to begin every conversation with a mention of my wife). But open bar + comfy couches + dancing + no spouses allowed = recipe for disaster. I don't think I was in any danger myself, but I'm glad I left when I did.