His and Hers X
His and Hers is a question or discussion topic relating to marriage that I post every Tuesday or Wednesday. On Friday, my wife and I each write our thoughts on the topic. (We didn't actually have time to write anything on Friday. I'm posting this on Saturday and dating it Friday in order to keep my archives consistent.—Curt.) I invite other bloggers to do the same with their spouses as an exercise in celebrating marriage. This week's question is:
In your early 20s, what did you think you'd be doing in your current stage of life? How does your expectation differ from the reality?
Mrs. Happy's response
When I was a child, I used to fantasize about being older. I could hardly wait 'til I was 10 years old...then what would it be like to be sixteen, eighteen, twenty? Then I'd go off to college until I was 22. That's about where my future, as far as I could imagine, was completely up in the air. When I actually reached the age of 22, I realized I had still never envisioned my life beyond that year, mainly because I didn't know what I wanted to be when I grew up, and the uncertainty was a little scary. From my limited perspective, I figured I'd probably live with my parents until I got married in my mid-twenties to some faceless, nameless man (only because I couldn't imagine him, not because I didn't have extremely high standards). I would continue to live in Texas for the rest of my life, own a cute little house in the outskirts of Austin, and certainly have two kids by the time I was thirty...which is right about now. That all sounds fine and good, and I admit there are days when I long for that safe little picture, but now I realize how much more of an adventure I had in store for me, and how I wouldn't trade it for anything. At 22, I knew nothing. By 23, I had a nice job and was engaged and then married to my best friend, who encouraged me to utilize my talents and further my education, which brought us to New York by 25. That's right, NEW YORK!!! That's the last place I thought I'd ever live, but here we are! So by 29, I've earned my Master's degree, had multiple fascinating job experiences, joined the most wonderful church in the world, made some incredible, lasting friendships, and continued to cultivate and strengthen a unique and beautiful marriage. I still have about 5 months to make some twins, but that was kind of an arbitrary estimate in the first place. Now I don't really have any more projections for the future, 'cause really, what do I know?!
Curt's response
When I was in my early 20s, I could not imagine a pleasant future for myself. I thought that at the age of 31 (my current age), I would be making a barely livable wage as a reporter or copyeditor on a weekly small-town newspaper and living alone (or possibly with a roach or a mouse) in an efficiency apartment in a questionable part of town. That was my vision before I became friends with the pre-Mrs. Happy. That vision did not really change much in the following years, except that I began imagining myself with a good friend. Things have turned out much, much differently, as you can see just by reading this blog's title. I have a good job. I rent part of a house that is blessedly free of vermin. I'm married to a beautiful, wonderful woman. I'm so glad. I hate roaches.
