Saturday, May 15, 2004

Marriage links for the week  

Irene has a lot of friends getting married this year. It has prompted her to ponder her own expectations for a future husband, as well as her reasons for wanting to be married and some challenges she is only now beginning to understand. Great posts, all of them.

Joe McKeever explains the importance of creating and maintaining family traditions.

Marla, the Proverbial Wife, has some thoughts on the proper care and feeding of husbands.

Wizard Needs Food Badly. Apparently that's a song I somehow missed in my teens. Affektion calls it "a great '80s child song about husband and wife relations, or boys and their toys." Maybe he's right.

The secret to a happy, long lasting marriage? According to researchers in England, it is "a common agenda quietly negotiated in those first few tricky years and then stuck to." Check out the bottom of the article for some other interesting links.

There is a mathematical equation for determining a person's optimal marrying age. I can't quite decipher what the equation is, but my best guess is M = (Y+1)/e + X - Y, with M being the age at which a person should take what they can get rather than gambling on the possibility of a better spouse coming along, Y being the age at which you start looking for a partner, X being the age at which you would give up and stop looking, and e being 2.718. According to this, I will reach my optimum marrying age next year, after seven years of marriage. I often repeat this to myself: "In matters of human will, statistics are irrelevant." I can say the same about mathematical equations.

Divorce is high among ex-NFL players. Love and trust are the two most important ingredients in marriage. Men fall in love more quickly than women. Mothers never get a pie in the face in movies. So says one columnist.

Friday, May 14, 2004

His and Hers X  

His and Hers is a question or discussion topic relating to marriage that I post every Tuesday or Wednesday. On Friday, my wife and I each write our thoughts on the topic. I invite other bloggers to do the same with their spouses as an exercise in celebrating marriage. This week's question is:

How has marriage affected the other relationships in your life?

Mrs. Happy's response

My first thought regarding this question is a little on the sad side, as I feel that I have neglected many of my other relationships due to the closeness of my marriage and the directions it has taken me through the last six years. However, upon greater reflection, I realize that Curt has modeled a deep sense of family devotion and loyalty that I am still learning to adopt and apply to my own family—and my friendships, too. Even though I've been a poor correspondent at times, I would hope that everyone I love knows that I love them and that I would do everything in my power to be the friend, sister, daughter, granddaughter, etc., that they need me to be.

Curt's response

My marriage has affected my relationships in one major way. It has made them better. Being married and loving my wife as deeply as I do has taught me how two people can relate on an intimate level. This knowledge now informs all of my relationships with family, friends, coworkers, acquaintances, and passersby. I understand myself better because my wife brings out aspects of my personality that I was unaware of before I met her. I understand relationships better because I'm more aware of what makes them work. In short, I'm a better friend and a better person because of my marriage, and that shows in my other relationships.

Thursday, May 13, 2004

Sadness and loss  

My heart is breaking right now for my friend Rey. Read his post from Wednesday to see why. My spirit has been heavy since I read that, and I've been praying for him and his family at every opportunity. I'm going through a structured Bible study right now, and today's lesson coincidentally (or maybe not) focused on coping with grief, pain, and fear. Though the grief I feel on his behalf is nothing compared to his own feelings right now, I found comfort in this passage in Luke 22:39–42 (ESV):

And [Jesus] came out and went, as was his custom, to the Mount of Olives, and the disciples followed him. And when he came to the place, he said to them, "Pray that you may not enter into temptation." And he withdrew from them about a stone's throw, and knelt down and prayed, saying, "Father, if you are willing, remove this cup from me. Nevertheless, not my will, but yours, be done." And there appeared to him an angel from heaven, strengthening him.

I'm sure I've read that before, but it has never really sunk in that God sent an angel to strengthen Jesus. My NASB notes that the verse about the angel doesn't appear in some ancient manuscripts, but I find it powerful nevertheless. If God comforted Jesus with such divine intervention, maybe He does that for some of His adopted children as well. That is my prayer for my friend and his wife tonight.

Wednesday, May 12, 2004

Busy  

Mrs. Happy and I have been busy learning lines and rehearsing for a dramatic presentation we're doing at our church on Friday, so I've had little time for blogging. I always feel a little guilty when I claim my RLTB™ rights, but I try to keep in mind that no one's life suffers in the absence of my contributions, and the world continues to rotate and revolve just as it did before I ever started this blog. And Real Life does indeed Trump Blogging. Some bloggers apologize when they're unable to post anything of substance, but I generally find such posts a little self-important, so I'm not going to do anything like that. Unless this post is like that.

Anyway, here's this week's His and Hers question:

How has marriage affected the other relationships in your life?

Don't forget to visit Spare Change for this week's Christian Carnival. If you don't have time to regularly read a variety of blogs, the Carnival gives you a chance to sample some of the best in Christian blogging, so check it out.

Tuesday, May 11, 2004

Thought I'd be Ecclesiastes  

 

You are Proverbs
You are Proverbs.

Which book of the Bible are you?
brought to you by Quizilla

Mrs. Happy and I have never done one of these (completely silly and inane, but also kind of fun) Internet quizzes together before. We came out the same. Almost all of the description applies to me. I do crave knowledge, understanding, and wisdom more than almost anything in life. My wife, on the other hand, is more intuitive than logical, often feeling the right solution to a problem I've only begun to analyze. She definitely has a tender heart, and people flock to her asking for guidance. I think the part that says "You don't speak much" doesn't really apply to her, although she swears she doesn't talk much when I'm not around.

Monday, May 10, 2004

Reminiscence No. 4  

It's time once again for my periodic foray into blogocentrism. A couple of people have told me that they have made a point of reading every single post I've ever written. It's gratifying to know that my words and experiences have touched people so deeply that they would invest so much time and effort into exploring as many of my thoughts as they possibly can. But, sadly, I don't think it happens that often. In fact, tomorrow I could probably post something from my archives and pass it off as new with no one the wiser. It pains me to think that my posts—as a writer, my posts are the closest thing I have to children—go unread and even unnoticed by most visitors. So about every six weeks I look at things I wrote four or five months previously and call attention to some of my favorites. I am sad to report that, comments prior to January 6, 2004, seem to have disappeared into cyberspace. I don't know why.

During this time, I also published the love stories shared by Rey (Jan. 22) and Larry (Jan. 29). If you'd like to share your love story, please send it to me in an e-mail. I love to hear them.

If this is your first look into The Happy Husband's past, check out Reminiscences No. 1, No. 2, and No. 3.