Saturday, May 29, 2004

Marriage links for the week  

Ryan talks about how a marriage's spice comes from differences between spouses.

The WorldMag Blog wonders whether Shrek 2 is a pro-marriage fairy tale. I haven't seen it, so I'm reserving judgment on that.

Irene is single and thinks a lot about marriage. She says that her desire to marry is enhancing her prayer life.

James at Loopy Meals thinks it's hilarious that his wife finds him attractive. I can certainly empathize with his feelings. (Thanks to Irene for the link.)

I ran across an essay this week called Stumbling Toward a Theology of Getting Married. It's a year old, but still fascinating.

Dr. Warnock created a list of his top ten favorite bloggers. Speaking objectively, I must say that he made some quality selections.

Thursday, May 27, 2004

Affairs of the heart  

Ben at Marriages Restored has a great series of posts warning against the damage an emotional affair can do to a marriage. Go there and read part 1, part 2, and part 3. When Mrs. Happy and I were engaged, she told me that she felt good to be marrying a man incapable of adultery. I said, "But I thought you agreed to marry me!" I told her that I'm quite capable of committing adultery, and that the more I'm aware of my weaknesses, the more I can compensate for them, thereby lessening the chances of succumbing to temptation. Better men than I (King David, for example) have committed adultery, so it would be arrogant of me to think that I'm immune to that sin. We discussed that for several hours. She couldn't imagine me as an adulterer, but I knew that the moment I think I have any sin under control is the same moment in which I drop my guard and open myself up to failure.

We brought it up in premarital counseling, and our counselor confirmed that every man is capable of adultery and that every good man is constantly on guard against it. Women aren't immune to the temptation either. Ben's story shows that sex outside of marriage is only one of several ways to commit adultery. It's important to guard your body, your mind, your heart, and your spirit. The parts of your life that you leave unguarded are by definition the parts most vulnerable to attack.

Wednesday, May 26, 2004

It's like buttah  

Mike Myers used to do a bit on Saturday Night Live in which he portrayed a character named Linda Richman who had her own TV talk show called Coffee Talk. She was an older New York Jewish lady who liberally sprinkled Yiddish words into everything she said and, two or three times per episode, would find herself overcome with emotion. Whenever that happened, she would announce, "I'm a little farklempttalk amongst yourselves…I'll give you a topic and you go with it…Diamond Shamrock sells neither diamonds nor shamrocks…discuss."

Real life is making me a little farklempt (which means choked up, according to a Yiddish dictionary, but I'm using it to mean unable to blog) right now. So I'm going to put out a topic and hope that a bunch of people comment on it:

A spouse can't make you happy. The most he or she can do is make you happier.

Discuss.

Monday, May 24, 2004

Looking back, looking ahead, and celebrating  

I met my wife in May of 1994. She was 19. I was 22. It was ten years ago, but it seems like yesterday. Sometimes I look at her and feel like we've known each other for only a couple of weeks. What a couple of weeks, though.

We each had a lifetime of experiences before we met. Looking back, I can see how my circuitous life led up to meeting her, and how our meeting served as a springboard for my life since. My entire life, from the moment I was born to this moment right now, seems to have involved her in some way.

I love her. I can honestly say that I can't remember a time when I didn't, and I can't imagine a time when I won't. Yesterday was the sixth anniversary of our wedding in 1998, the first day of our seventh year as husband and wife. I eagerly anticipate finding out what the future holds.